Divorce is a horrible process for anyone who is involve, whether it is the wife, husband, or children, no one enjoys divorce.
There are six stages of divorce-
1. Emotional
2. Legal
3. Economic
4. Coparental
5. Community
6. Psychic
Which stage do you think it is most harmful and toughest stage to get through?! You guessed it... Psychic!
I think that last stage, psychic stage, is the
most important stage because it can effect how the rest of the stages go in a
divorce. The psychic stage means that the divorce is final and that both
parties realize the marriage is over, but they are still in each other’s lives
whether it is for good reasons or bad reasons. Most of the time it is because
they still want to harm one another, but sometimes it is because they have
children and have to be apart of each other’s lives.
This stage is the most
detrimental stage and can be the most harmful stage if there are children
involved. This point is important because mothers and fathers need to stop
being cruel to one another no matter how hurt they are because they could ruin
their child’s relationship with the other parent. A lot of feelings are hurt
during a divorce, but mothers and fathers need to remember that it was their
decision to sign those papers not their child’s so they need to focus on an
amicable relationship for them and not for each other. The children did not want this you guys did!!! We need to be less
selfish personally and focus on bettering relationships for children who are
more important.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Monday, December 14, 2015
Parenting Within Families...
Mothers and Fathers need to be on the same page!! When there is a divide it is only harmful for your children because they do not learn unity. Counseling together before handling problems is a great idea for parents to do. It allows for you both to sit down and discuss what you individually think should happen, but then also come together on an agreement of what will happen.
Six Guidelines that can help parents with their Children regarding consequences-
1. Plan in Advance
2. Involve the child
3. Give If/Then and When/ Then statements
4. Logically connect consequence to the situation
5. Give choice and act
6. Let the child try again
I believe that if parents followed these guidelines that both they and the child would grow so much more. When the child is involved in the consequence they will understand more about why they are being punished or disciplined, which causes less arguments and more understanding. I think many parents think that their child does not understand what they did wrong so it is their right to discipline them so they know that what they did is wrong, but their discipline does not match the crime that they committed.
Children will be children and they will mess up, but as parents we need to unite together in order to make sure that our children grow up understanding reason and logic.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Six Guidelines that can help parents with their Children regarding consequences-
1. Plan in Advance
2. Involve the child
3. Give If/Then and When/ Then statements
4. Logically connect consequence to the situation
5. Give choice and act
6. Let the child try again
I believe that if parents followed these guidelines that both they and the child would grow so much more. When the child is involved in the consequence they will understand more about why they are being punished or disciplined, which causes less arguments and more understanding. I think many parents think that their child does not understand what they did wrong so it is their right to discipline them so they know that what they did is wrong, but their discipline does not match the crime that they committed.
Children will be children and they will mess up, but as parents we need to unite together in order to make sure that our children grow up understanding reason and logic.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
How Important Are Fathers in the Family...
Fathers are key people!!! More and more studies are showing that when a father is not present within the home there are some major problems that happen. Girls are not getting that proper male attention from their fathers that they need and will them start to seek it out from other people, but inappropriately. Boys are missing that role model in the home and will turn to other bad role models to also get that male attention that they need.
Many fathers work outside the home and are already missing out on a lot during the day, but we need to remember that once we are off of work that it is family time.
Mothers can help fathers feel that attachment by showing them that they are needed by not only them, but also the children. Moms need to allow dad to have one on one time with the children so that they can create a bond and relationship that does not involve you in it. Encourage him to take the children out for personal dates or outings and make sure that he feels like you are in a partnership and not just it is your way or the highway.
As mothers we need to be patient more with the fathers of our children. We are instinctively nurturing and for them it takes awhile to develop. We get nine months of attachment so lets make sure that we give them some time to get the hang of things.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Many fathers work outside the home and are already missing out on a lot during the day, but we need to remember that once we are off of work that it is family time.
Mothers can help fathers feel that attachment by showing them that they are needed by not only them, but also the children. Moms need to allow dad to have one on one time with the children so that they can create a bond and relationship that does not involve you in it. Encourage him to take the children out for personal dates or outings and make sure that he feels like you are in a partnership and not just it is your way or the highway.
As mothers we need to be patient more with the fathers of our children. We are instinctively nurturing and for them it takes awhile to develop. We get nine months of attachment so lets make sure that we give them some time to get the hang of things.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Communication Within the Family...
COMMUNICATION IS KEY PEOPLE!!!!
There is never a moment when we are not communicating with people. YOU CANNOT NOT COMMUNICATE... Isn't that crazy!!!
There are three ways people communicate:
1. Words
2. Tone
3. Non- Verbal
We communicate the most through non verbals with people, then through tones, and then through words. Is anyone else surprised about this like I was?!?! I am a girl, I totally thought that I talked way more than anything else. If you ask my husband he says that I talk too much sometimes, but then I think about it and it makes sense. There are so many times when him and I are talking and my body just says something completely different than I do. It's like my body is telling the truth, but I am saying something else.
I wonder if this means that we should rely on our body more with people than with our words. You know the saying sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt men... This takes it to a whole other level.
I guess my only question is why do we get so upset when people offend us if we use words much less than we do non verbals? Just a food for thought. Let me know what you think!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
There is never a moment when we are not communicating with people. YOU CANNOT NOT COMMUNICATE... Isn't that crazy!!!
There are three ways people communicate:
1. Words
2. Tone
3. Non- Verbal
We communicate the most through non verbals with people, then through tones, and then through words. Is anyone else surprised about this like I was?!?! I am a girl, I totally thought that I talked way more than anything else. If you ask my husband he says that I talk too much sometimes, but then I think about it and it makes sense. There are so many times when him and I are talking and my body just says something completely different than I do. It's like my body is telling the truth, but I am saying something else.
I wonder if this means that we should rely on our body more with people than with our words. You know the saying sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt men... This takes it to a whole other level.
I guess my only question is why do we get so upset when people offend us if we use words much less than we do non verbals? Just a food for thought. Let me know what you think!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Family Under Stress
Stress is a harmful thing for a family, however, with the right coping techniques we can all improve!
Three things that we need to remember when is comes to coping is-
1. We need to have the right attitude.
2. If you cope before the problem then the problem will not seem as bad.
3. Reactions and Transitions need to be handled with caution and care.
Cloe Madana wrote a book called, Sex, Love, and Violence. She discusses how to work with a family who is under stress in order to help them out of their crisis. She first starts out by figuring out what happened to cause this crisis. She gets the background information before diving in. She then asks who was hurt and why they were hurt. Many people forget that usually during a crisis all family members were hurt the degree of the hurt may differ, but it just depends on the problem. Finally she helps them to understand two main points; Evil is always stupid and when there is violence it hurts the spirit. How this is not a religious conversation, but rather a truth conversation because most of the time when there is hurt there is pain and suffering that need to be dealt with. We can have our souls hurt or the spirit of ourselves hurt without making it a religious thing.
I believe that working this a crisis with your family when done correctly only makes it stronger. We need to support and love each other so that we can all achieve and not fail one another. The stronger we are at coping through stressors the easier it is to move on and get through hard times.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Three things that we need to remember when is comes to coping is-
1. We need to have the right attitude.
2. If you cope before the problem then the problem will not seem as bad.
3. Reactions and Transitions need to be handled with caution and care.
Cloe Madana wrote a book called, Sex, Love, and Violence. She discusses how to work with a family who is under stress in order to help them out of their crisis. She first starts out by figuring out what happened to cause this crisis. She gets the background information before diving in. She then asks who was hurt and why they were hurt. Many people forget that usually during a crisis all family members were hurt the degree of the hurt may differ, but it just depends on the problem. Finally she helps them to understand two main points; Evil is always stupid and when there is violence it hurts the spirit. How this is not a religious conversation, but rather a truth conversation because most of the time when there is hurt there is pain and suffering that need to be dealt with. We can have our souls hurt or the spirit of ourselves hurt without making it a religious thing.
I believe that working this a crisis with your family when done correctly only makes it stronger. We need to support and love each other so that we can all achieve and not fail one another. The stronger we are at coping through stressors the easier it is to move on and get through hard times.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Sexual Relationships...
Let's get excited... We are talking Sexual Intimacy and Responses today!
First off we need to start off my saying that there are four stages of sexual responses. They include Excitement, Plateau, Orgasm, and Resolution.
Now something that I have noticed is that men and women are very different when it comes to sexual things, especially about how they talk about sex or other things. Women are more likely to have sex when they feel safe and secure with their man, but men are more likely to have sex with their woman in order to feel safe and secure with them. See people we are definitely different! The question that comes to my mind then is how do we get on the same page? If we both need different things in order to feel safe and secure, but always want to have sex where is the solution or compromise.
I think it comes from communicating and understanding where the other person is coming from. I believe that sometimes men need to step up their game and show women that they are secure with them, but on the other hand women need to have sex with them so that they will feel secure in their relationship.
Many challenges can happen as well while being intimate with one another because our bodies are different. Our timing, hormones, and different experiences can cause for some unsatisfying encounters with one another. We need to remember that intimacy should be fun, but also about compromise. Work with one another and remember that if you really care about this person than compromising will benefit you both in the long run!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
First off we need to start off my saying that there are four stages of sexual responses. They include Excitement, Plateau, Orgasm, and Resolution.
Now something that I have noticed is that men and women are very different when it comes to sexual things, especially about how they talk about sex or other things. Women are more likely to have sex when they feel safe and secure with their man, but men are more likely to have sex with their woman in order to feel safe and secure with them. See people we are definitely different! The question that comes to my mind then is how do we get on the same page? If we both need different things in order to feel safe and secure, but always want to have sex where is the solution or compromise.
I think it comes from communicating and understanding where the other person is coming from. I believe that sometimes men need to step up their game and show women that they are secure with them, but on the other hand women need to have sex with them so that they will feel secure in their relationship.
Many challenges can happen as well while being intimate with one another because our bodies are different. Our timing, hormones, and different experiences can cause for some unsatisfying encounters with one another. We need to remember that intimacy should be fun, but also about compromise. Work with one another and remember that if you really care about this person than compromising will benefit you both in the long run!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Sunday, December 13, 2015
How to Avoid Harsh Adjustments When Starting a Family...
Ever wonder when problems will go away once you have children? I hate to break it to you, but sometimes that problems that you start out with just get bigger!
I created a list, however, of how you can avoid problems that come about once children come.
1. Discuss how many children that you want, what type of parent you want to be for your children, and what type of parenting style will most likely work for you. Now remember this is a conversation that should happen before children come, but sometimes people forget and need to discuss this once the first child comes. Parenting is hard and it only gets harder when two parents have two different parenting styles so make sure you communicate and work together.
2. You need to talk about what your expectations are for your children and what rules you want to set. You do not want your children learning which parent to go to for advice or things because they know the other parent will not give in. Also having two parents with two different rules or expectations will only cause more harm to your children and your relationship with your spouse so once again communicate and get on the same page!
3. Finally, MOTHERS MAKE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR HUSBANDS! Sometimes as women we think just because we have a maternal instinct that we know what is best for our children, but HELLO we can be wrong sometimes. We need to make sure that the fathers feel needed so that they do not separate themselves from both you and your children. We all need to feel needed, but we need to make sure especially that fathers have a role in their children's lives because mom is not always going to be there and dads will have to know what to do!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
I created a list, however, of how you can avoid problems that come about once children come.
1. Discuss how many children that you want, what type of parent you want to be for your children, and what type of parenting style will most likely work for you. Now remember this is a conversation that should happen before children come, but sometimes people forget and need to discuss this once the first child comes. Parenting is hard and it only gets harder when two parents have two different parenting styles so make sure you communicate and work together.
2. You need to talk about what your expectations are for your children and what rules you want to set. You do not want your children learning which parent to go to for advice or things because they know the other parent will not give in. Also having two parents with two different rules or expectations will only cause more harm to your children and your relationship with your spouse so once again communicate and get on the same page!
3. Finally, MOTHERS MAKE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR HUSBANDS! Sometimes as women we think just because we have a maternal instinct that we know what is best for our children, but HELLO we can be wrong sometimes. We need to make sure that the fathers feel needed so that they do not separate themselves from both you and your children. We all need to feel needed, but we need to make sure especially that fathers have a role in their children's lives because mom is not always going to be there and dads will have to know what to do!
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Different Types of Love Within a Family...
How do you know that you are choosing the right partner? Are you in love? What is love? How do you prepare for marriage and all of those changes that are about to come?
There are four types of love according to Greek language and they all come at different times and look differently. These four types of love are Eros, Philia, Storge, and Agape.
Eros is the type of love we feel as humans when we are in the emotional and romantic stage of our relationships. Usually this comes right in the beginning when our relationships are very new and exciting still. Looking back when I met my husband in high school we went through this stage when he did no wrong and everything thing he did even if it was little made me like or love him more and more. I think this is the feeling that gets us into trouble a lot because we think we like someone so much, but we do not really know them all that well.
Philia is a friendship type of love that you feel towards those who you are close with, but are not dating or anything like that. I definitely love my best friends! They are practically my sisters at this point in my life. They are the people that I share interests with, share my secrets with, and share my personal thoughts with. If I did not love them in a way that I do I could not be open and honest with them as I do now. I know that they love I have for them is different, but I also know that if I did not love them in a Philia way that we would not have the same type of relationship. It says a lot about a person you are friends with when you develop a type of Philia love for them.
Storge is the love a parent has for their child or children. When I think about my parents I know they love me, but again it is a different type of love than how they love each other. My parents sacrifice a lot for me and my brother and I know that they would not do the things they do for myself and him if they did not have a deep love for us. We are their offspring for Heaven sakes, if they do not love us how we can expect others to love us?
Agape is a general love that we can feel towards others, especially strangers. I think of this type of love when you are serving or giving towards others that you may not even know. While delivering food in San Francisco a few years ago to people who could not leave their homes I felt this type of love. I loved them because I wanted to help and serve them. We do not need to know people personally to serve and love them from afar.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
There are four types of love according to Greek language and they all come at different times and look differently. These four types of love are Eros, Philia, Storge, and Agape.
Eros is the type of love we feel as humans when we are in the emotional and romantic stage of our relationships. Usually this comes right in the beginning when our relationships are very new and exciting still. Looking back when I met my husband in high school we went through this stage when he did no wrong and everything thing he did even if it was little made me like or love him more and more. I think this is the feeling that gets us into trouble a lot because we think we like someone so much, but we do not really know them all that well.
Philia is a friendship type of love that you feel towards those who you are close with, but are not dating or anything like that. I definitely love my best friends! They are practically my sisters at this point in my life. They are the people that I share interests with, share my secrets with, and share my personal thoughts with. If I did not love them in a way that I do I could not be open and honest with them as I do now. I know that they love I have for them is different, but I also know that if I did not love them in a Philia way that we would not have the same type of relationship. It says a lot about a person you are friends with when you develop a type of Philia love for them.
Storge is the love a parent has for their child or children. When I think about my parents I know they love me, but again it is a different type of love than how they love each other. My parents sacrifice a lot for me and my brother and I know that they would not do the things they do for myself and him if they did not have a deep love for us. We are their offspring for Heaven sakes, if they do not love us how we can expect others to love us?
Agape is a general love that we can feel towards others, especially strangers. I think of this type of love when you are serving or giving towards others that you may not even know. While delivering food in San Francisco a few years ago to people who could not leave their homes I felt this type of love. I loved them because I wanted to help and serve them. We do not need to know people personally to serve and love them from afar.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Saturday, October 17, 2015
Gender Roles Within Families...
What are the differences between men and women? Why does society treat us so differently? What would the world be like if people were all equal?
This week I want to talk about how the family is getting attacked do to gender roles and how people are so consumed with defining or labeling people.
Have you ever heard about the E.B.E. (The Exotic Become Erotic) Model by Daryl Bem? Well I had not either until this past Thursday. Bem has created this chart that explains why people may think that they are attracted to the same- sex, but in reality it may simply be from other factors that happened throughout their life. (See chart below)
Biological Variables --> Child Temperament --> Child Preferences in Play- Typical vs. Atypical --> If they are typical then they see themselves as similar to their peers, however if they are atypical then they view themselves as different from peers --> Non- Specific Autonomic Arousal --> Attention is on Girls or Attention is on Boys --> Attention still on same- sex --> They view themselves as "Gay"
I really like this model because I think it helps explain a little more in depth why many may feel "different" as a child, which they then believe that they are attracted to the same- sex. This model helps me to see that as a child may different things are happening to you all at once. If you do not get the attention you are wanting from the same- sex at and early age you crave for the attention until you get it, however, the problem comes about when the other peers have moved onto the other sex and you are still wanting the attention from the same- sex.
Do you think children are miss interpreting how they are feeling because they do not know a lot about the changes they are going through? Or may be they just do not understand what is "wrong" with them even though there is nothing "wrong" with them? These are all questions that I do not know and do not claim to know, but would love to further look into them and may help children and families if they need it.
Personally, I believe that Bem is on to something and I am going to further look into his model and theory because there is some truth I believe to it.
Here is a link to further look into this model on your own if you would like. Now I know it is from Wikipedia, but I think it is a good place to start and branch off from there is you are truly interested. http://www.psychwiki.com/wiki/Bem's_Exotic_Becomes_Erotic_Theory
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
This week I want to talk about how the family is getting attacked do to gender roles and how people are so consumed with defining or labeling people.
Have you ever heard about the E.B.E. (The Exotic Become Erotic) Model by Daryl Bem? Well I had not either until this past Thursday. Bem has created this chart that explains why people may think that they are attracted to the same- sex, but in reality it may simply be from other factors that happened throughout their life. (See chart below)
Biological Variables --> Child Temperament --> Child Preferences in Play- Typical vs. Atypical --> If they are typical then they see themselves as similar to their peers, however if they are atypical then they view themselves as different from peers --> Non- Specific Autonomic Arousal --> Attention is on Girls or Attention is on Boys --> Attention still on same- sex --> They view themselves as "Gay"
I really like this model because I think it helps explain a little more in depth why many may feel "different" as a child, which they then believe that they are attracted to the same- sex. This model helps me to see that as a child may different things are happening to you all at once. If you do not get the attention you are wanting from the same- sex at and early age you crave for the attention until you get it, however, the problem comes about when the other peers have moved onto the other sex and you are still wanting the attention from the same- sex.
Do you think children are miss interpreting how they are feeling because they do not know a lot about the changes they are going through? Or may be they just do not understand what is "wrong" with them even though there is nothing "wrong" with them? These are all questions that I do not know and do not claim to know, but would love to further look into them and may help children and families if they need it.
Personally, I believe that Bem is on to something and I am going to further look into his model and theory because there is some truth I believe to it.
Here is a link to further look into this model on your own if you would like. Now I know it is from Wikipedia, but I think it is a good place to start and branch off from there is you are truly interested. http://www.psychwiki.com/wiki/Bem's_Exotic_Becomes_Erotic_Theory
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Culture Within Families...
Our families are all different because we all come from different cultures. Why do you think that culture influences our family so much? When do you think this started happening?
When we talk about Mexican Culture are we talking about true Mexican Culture or just what we think of as Mexican Culture? I have been thinking a lot about how culture differs from one person to another because of their family and their traditions/ beliefs. I think that we spend too much time worrying about other people and do not spend enough time worrying about our own families.
We discussed in my class this week the idea about Coming to America. Now although I do not know much about this and have not been through this process personally, I could only imagine it being painful. We talked about how the expectations that people have coming to America, the cost, and the time it take to get here. I just want to know... Is it worth it? I have to believe it is only because people spend a lot of money, time away from their families, and make personal sacrifices to come here.
The main point about this journey that intrigues me is how the family functions once the family changes. Parents are no longer together, children are getting jobs, and the family relies on the extended family more. However, when they are all together again you can tell there are major changes happening. The parents are not united and the extended family now plays a bigger role and intend because they filled a void that the family had.
This process sounds painful because of the negative effect it has on the family... I just have to know is it worth it? How do you see your culture effecting your own family?
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
When we talk about Mexican Culture are we talking about true Mexican Culture or just what we think of as Mexican Culture? I have been thinking a lot about how culture differs from one person to another because of their family and their traditions/ beliefs. I think that we spend too much time worrying about other people and do not spend enough time worrying about our own families.
We discussed in my class this week the idea about Coming to America. Now although I do not know much about this and have not been through this process personally, I could only imagine it being painful. We talked about how the expectations that people have coming to America, the cost, and the time it take to get here. I just want to know... Is it worth it? I have to believe it is only because people spend a lot of money, time away from their families, and make personal sacrifices to come here.
The main point about this journey that intrigues me is how the family functions once the family changes. Parents are no longer together, children are getting jobs, and the family relies on the extended family more. However, when they are all together again you can tell there are major changes happening. The parents are not united and the extended family now plays a bigger role and intend because they filled a void that the family had.
This process sounds painful because of the negative effect it has on the family... I just have to know is it worth it? How do you see your culture effecting your own family?
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Theories In Family...
There are many different theories when it comes to the family and how it works, however, in my blog post today I have to discuss four that are fairly common and used by many to explain different aspects.
The first theory is Conflict Theory, which clearly means that when there are less resources to share or have there are more problems within families. For instance when a father loses his job there are many problems that will come about. It could be that the parents have to cut back on their spending habits and that some extra activities will have to go to pay for bills. These lack of resources and sacrifices will cause conflicts between family members.
The next theory is Exchange Theory, which basically means that we have a give and take relationship. It is well balanced and each person's needs are being met. No one person is doing more than the other and this particular relationship may have more depth to it that others because they understand the needs and wants of the other person.
The Family Systems Theory means that what we create together as a family is greater than what we create individually. Think about your own family... Do you think you would be better with them or without them? Would your life still work if they did not play their particular role in your own life? This theory proves that family members have their own role within a family and when they want to change or break from this role adjustments may be needed because there is true value in each role that is given.
The last theory is Symbolic- Interaction Theory, which means that every interaction or behavior represents or symbolizes something about the relationship. This is self explanatory, but an example could be when two people kiss when they first see each other are mostly likely dating or are seeing one another. The kiss symbolizes them being together.
I hope these theories opened up your eyes a little more to how complex and in depth families can be. There is no one theory to explain families because each family is different and functions differently. Please ponder about your family and think about what roles certain people play within the home.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
The first theory is Conflict Theory, which clearly means that when there are less resources to share or have there are more problems within families. For instance when a father loses his job there are many problems that will come about. It could be that the parents have to cut back on their spending habits and that some extra activities will have to go to pay for bills. These lack of resources and sacrifices will cause conflicts between family members.
The next theory is Exchange Theory, which basically means that we have a give and take relationship. It is well balanced and each person's needs are being met. No one person is doing more than the other and this particular relationship may have more depth to it that others because they understand the needs and wants of the other person.
The Family Systems Theory means that what we create together as a family is greater than what we create individually. Think about your own family... Do you think you would be better with them or without them? Would your life still work if they did not play their particular role in your own life? This theory proves that family members have their own role within a family and when they want to change or break from this role adjustments may be needed because there is true value in each role that is given.
The last theory is Symbolic- Interaction Theory, which means that every interaction or behavior represents or symbolizes something about the relationship. This is self explanatory, but an example could be when two people kiss when they first see each other are mostly likely dating or are seeing one another. The kiss symbolizes them being together.
I hope these theories opened up your eyes a little more to how complex and in depth families can be. There is no one theory to explain families because each family is different and functions differently. Please ponder about your family and think about what roles certain people play within the home.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Saturday, September 26, 2015
Myths About the Family...
Below is a list of items that I am going to be discussing in my post today... I would like you to tell me which item is a fact or a myth about the family?
1. Love is not the reason to get married.
2. Having children makes for a happier marriage.
3. Half of marriages end in divorce.
4. Opposites attract to one another.
So what do you think? Well let me tell you that ALL of those items listed above are MYTHS!!!
Love is not the reason to get married because over time people's love changes. I can honestly say that I do not love my husband the same today then I did when we got married because I LOVE HIM MORE. Also love has a different meaning to every person and so measuring love can be a very tricky thing.
Statistics show that people actually are less happy once they start having children because a husband and wife spend more time focusing on their children than they do focusing on each other. If you are married please remember that your spouse was there before your children and they will be there after your children. I am not saying to not care about your children, but I am saying to spend time with one another, still go out on dates, still make each other laugh, and most importantly still remember that they are your number one person which means they should be a priority as well.
It is not true that half of marriages end in divorce, but rather 75% of marriages last. One thing that I have noticed through reading textbooks, articles, and research is that people tend to post the negative information, rather than posting the positive information. Now this is my own personal observation, but I do wonder... If people would to post all the good that marriage has to offer people and not the bad would more people be inclined to get marriage and not be scared of the divorce rate? You are in control of your marriage people do not let the myth or statistic define your marriage!!!
Every person has their own personality. Opposite do not always attract, but sometimes they do. The more you have in common though the more likely you are to relate to one another and enjoy one another's company. Also sharing core values and sharing the same religion makes for a good relationship because you do not have to defend all the time why you feel the way you feel about certain topics. I just have one thought though... If opposite did attract don't you think people would get tired of fighting or arguing with one another? I do not have the answer, but I just wonder. Being in a relationship is all about having a POSITIVE OUTLOOK... IT GOES A LONG WAY!!!!
In end I just want to say that when it comes to marriage and families everyone if different. We all have different opinions, different spouses, and different children. What works for you may not work for someone else, but we should NOT let myths define who we are and how our lives turn out.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
1. Love is not the reason to get married.
2. Having children makes for a happier marriage.
3. Half of marriages end in divorce.
4. Opposites attract to one another.
So what do you think? Well let me tell you that ALL of those items listed above are MYTHS!!!
Love is not the reason to get married because over time people's love changes. I can honestly say that I do not love my husband the same today then I did when we got married because I LOVE HIM MORE. Also love has a different meaning to every person and so measuring love can be a very tricky thing.
Statistics show that people actually are less happy once they start having children because a husband and wife spend more time focusing on their children than they do focusing on each other. If you are married please remember that your spouse was there before your children and they will be there after your children. I am not saying to not care about your children, but I am saying to spend time with one another, still go out on dates, still make each other laugh, and most importantly still remember that they are your number one person which means they should be a priority as well.
It is not true that half of marriages end in divorce, but rather 75% of marriages last. One thing that I have noticed through reading textbooks, articles, and research is that people tend to post the negative information, rather than posting the positive information. Now this is my own personal observation, but I do wonder... If people would to post all the good that marriage has to offer people and not the bad would more people be inclined to get marriage and not be scared of the divorce rate? You are in control of your marriage people do not let the myth or statistic define your marriage!!!
Every person has their own personality. Opposite do not always attract, but sometimes they do. The more you have in common though the more likely you are to relate to one another and enjoy one another's company. Also sharing core values and sharing the same religion makes for a good relationship because you do not have to defend all the time why you feel the way you feel about certain topics. I just have one thought though... If opposite did attract don't you think people would get tired of fighting or arguing with one another? I do not have the answer, but I just wonder. Being in a relationship is all about having a POSITIVE OUTLOOK... IT GOES A LONG WAY!!!!
In end I just want to say that when it comes to marriage and families everyone if different. We all have different opinions, different spouses, and different children. What works for you may not work for someone else, but we should NOT let myths define who we are and how our lives turn out.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Thursday, September 17, 2015
Meet the Author...
Hello Humans!! My name is Gabrielle Smith. I am starting this blog to share my thoughts and insights about the Family. I am so excited to share with you and I hope that I can help someone out there reading this blog in some way, shape, or form. Please leave comments because I would love to have conversations with people about their family or simple families in general. Thank you for your support and I hope you enjoy reading my blog every week.
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
Be Kind to Others,
Gabby Smith
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